Mattress Police - Antisocial Commentary

I'm over at Central Snark today with some valuable money-saving tips.

Meanwhile, I've narrowed down the caption contest entries to ten. Keep in mind that I have an odd sense of humor, so if your caption didn't make the cut this time, don't feel bad.

You have until midnight on Friday to vote. I'll post the winners on Saturday.

And I'll be back tomorrow with a post about my brief stint as a fugitive from Johnny Law.

The Contenders

Jack: "Diesel, this one says your character in this show ranks on spot 59, right after the imaginary horse and before the palm tree to the West entrance! Give me the gun, I am supposed to kill you off!"

- Minka

The note says "you guys suck" and it's signed "MacGyver".

- neva

Oh great, it says we've been "yielded" by those bitches Dustin and Kandice... Still, I don't think we're allowed to shoot 'em.

- Harmonica Man

Convinced that the island is the perfect location for his new fertility clinic, Diesel stands guard over his own, rather ample "contribution" to future generations.

- The Drive-by Blogger

Okay kids, you've got one hour to clean up this mess or you're grounded...no fishing, no hiking, no playing with the Others.

- Em

In this week's episode of Lost, the cast is transported into a chapter out of Lord of the Flies.

Piggy: “My auntie told me not to run on account of my asthma.”

Diesel: "Okay. Order is lost. I've crushed the conch. Now, let's get Piggy!"

- Chrissy121875

"Hey Hugo, this one is for you. Delta is retroactively charging you for two seats."

- Murph

Right, I'm off hobbit-hunting.

- Lonie Polony

Uh-oh. Looks like that mail boat had some precious cargo. Listen up: "Little Ronnie Grabenhorst writes, 'Sometimes I feel like a little girl, Casey, but when Jessica offered to give me her own heart for my much needed transplant, I just had to cry. So could you play 'Heart Light' and dedicate it to the best friend a boy could ever have?'"

- Gawpo

There's a teller window somewhere missing a shitload of these whatever these are...
- furiousBall

Opinion Polls & Market Research

The Others don't want you to know about humor-blogs.com.

Labels: Caption Contest, Shout-Outs

neva said...: woot to the hoot! actually, that's for the hilarious-yet-informative (or should that be informative-yet-hilarious?) post you did for the Snark today. i'd say more, but i'm trying to save words -- something i'm clearly not very good at (any more than i am at saving money...sigh)

that said, i'm pleased and/or honored to be among so many fine/funny contenders again -- my only regret is that i failed to come up with a variation of one of my all-time Simpson's lines: "These berries taste like burning..." (spoken by Ralphie when the kids were stranded on an island)

alas, 'twas not meant to be. xox; 9:51 AM
Sandi said...: I'd like to see you in a pic with Jack Bauer.; 10:27 AM
furiousBall said...: Thanks for considering my nomination, I voted for the hobbit hunting one tho.; 10:30 AM
Minka said...: Wow, i am truly honoured and glad to see that your sense of humour is simialr to my own. I mean my caption simply was just awesome and I would have been plane (sorry plain!) crushed if I hadn´t made it to the finals! LOL

Soem witty people around here, that´s for sure! I am grateful, you make it seem like I am one of them!; 10:54 AM
Princess of Everything (and then some) said...: I voted for neva. But dammit I am going to have to arm wrastle someone for that photo cause I wanted it!!; 1:47 PM
Tammie Jean said...: Great contenders! I voted for Neva though - that was great!; 2:17 PM
Robin said...: Hey Diesel, I think there's something wrong with the voting thing. There's no label on the place you click to register your vote. Those of us with experience, of course, know where to click - but it's not very newcomer friendly...; 2:24 PM
Diesel said...: Robin - Yeah, I noticed that too. I think I'm going to use a different voting thingy next time.

For those of you who don't know, you cast your vote by clicking on the black area at the bottom of the poll.

Sorry about that.; 3:37 PM
Brad said...: This is starting to hurt. It's a good thing I love your blog :); 4:22 PM
Mr. Fabulous said...: Damn it, I need to work harder on my captions...; 5:57 PM
Chrissy121875 said...: HAHA! Oh wow! I finally made it as a finalist! This is a tough one to vote on because everyone's is so good!!!

Neva's always got good ones (captions, that is!!!)!

Hmmm...maybe I'll be super lame and get my husband to vote for me? LOL! j/k!; 10:06 PM
Chrissy121875 said...: Good morning, all!
I had a hard time figuring out how to vote. I guess I should have read Diesel's comment on here.

Neva..."These berries taste like burning..." HAHAHA! That's hilarious! Love it!

PS. Hubby did feel sorry for me and voted for me. LOL!; 5:48 AM
Shrink wrapped scream said...: Sorry mate, I've tagged you (it's in my latest post)..; 7:11 AM
Malnurtured Snay said...: I tried to vote for Minka - because she's got big boobs - but the vote thing seems to be broken, I can't find the "post" function ...; 7:42 AM
neva said...: Snay: "big boobs"? i'm seeing big boobs here, pal, but not on teh Penguin's chest.

kidding, i kid! ; ) her, ahem, breasts aren't necessarily bigger than mine, but they are younger, so there's that. xox; 12:37 PM
Queen of the Mayhem said...: Those are some great captions! I am going to have to put a lot more thought into the next one!; 1:59 PM
Manola Blablablanik said...: Bummer ... I don't know this show, so it's all Lost on me! ;-); 12:22 PM

Vote!

Archives