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Or Maybe "I See a Red Door and I Want It Painted Black"

I've been tagged with a Christmas meme by Poppy of Opiate of the Masses. I'm supposed to list what I got for Christmas, or didn't get, or wanted to get, or something. I'm not so good with following rules. It doesn't look like Poppy followed them pr... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 28, 2007


Caption Contest Winners

This week's winning caption came from the always clever Lonie Polony.In second place was this entry from y not i:So which one of you is Lionel Richie's kid again? 'Cause, man, I love that guy!And rounding out the pack was perennial favorite Joel B. w... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 28, 2007


Thursday Shout-Out

Our favorite Nazgul and meme-wraith, Grundir the Implacable, has taken time out of his busy meme-killing schedule to guest post at Crummy Church Signs. Tremble as the mighty Nazgul directs his unbridled fury toward misguided church signs.Grundir is ... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Thursday, September 27, 2007


Ahmadinejad Kills in New York, Launches North American Comedy Tour

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was an unexpected hit at Columbia University on Monday. "He's like the Iranian Yakov Smirnoff," said one attendee. "Except funny."At first it looked like Ahmadinejad was going to bomb. "Let me tell a joke here... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Wednesday, September 26, 2007


Make Diesel Read a Book - Update 4

Despite the impending holidays and the recent string of coups at the Mattress Police, the Lamest Contest Ever soldiers on. I have just ticked off two more books on my list, simply by reading them. You wouldn't think it would be so easy to anger boo... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Tuesday, September 25, 2007


Vote!

Man, this is getting tough. 144 captions? Are you serious? I'm working too hard for a retiree.Mrs. Diesel and I didn't have time to go over the entries last night, so I had to pick my favorites this morning. So you can blame me if your favorite d... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Tuesday, September 25, 2007


Equal Time

Now that Fred Thompson has announced his presidential candidacy, some television networks are yanking reruns of Law and Order featuring Thompson's character, District Attorney Arthur Branch, in order to comply with "Equal Time" restrictions. The equ... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Monday, September 24, 2007


Because One Blog Isn't Big Enough to Contain My Head

Now that I've rested a bit from my ordeal and sated myself with rice krispy treats and Dr. Pepper, I can spare a few moments to tell you about some of the changes that have recently occurred here.First, I've created a new look for my blog. If you ha... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Sunday, September 23, 2007


MOre bloggy goodies!!!

Hey Blogging Buddies!Troy Van Dellen back again with more blogarificgoodies! I know how tired you all must be of all the sarcasm and whiningthat used to be all over this site, so I'm just going to post nice stuff.Like this little number! Its a dog wh... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 21, 2007


Caption Contest: Paris and Britney

Thanks to this blog, I'm now considered something of a celebrity in some circles. Generally they are very small circles, drawn with chalk. Still, occasionally I get the opportunity to hobnob with the beautiful people. Witness the photo below.Submi... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 21, 2007


Thursday Shout-Out: G

No, that's not a typo. I'm giving a shout-out to the letter G. Like on Sesame Street, when they used to say "brought to you by the letters S, B, K and the number 7." Speaking of which, product placement on movies and TV shows has really gotten out... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Thursday, September 20, 2007


You Shall Tremble Before the Meme-Wraith!

Greetings, denizens of cyberspace! I am Grundir the Implacable. You may know me as one of the nine Nazgûl who once served the Dark Lord. You have probably heard by now that things are not going so well for my former master lately. Long story shor... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Wednesday, September 19, 2007


Whom, Meme?

I've decided that I hate memes. In case you're not familiar with blogging lingo, a meme is the blogging equivalent of a chain letter. Usually you’re instructed to answer some silly questions on your blog and then “tag” five or six other bloggers. Th... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Sunday, September 16, 2007


Congrats to the Winners

First prize this week goes to Jay from Cynical_Bastard. Congrats, Jay!Joel B. of Crummy Church Signs took second place:"Diesel had misread the classified ad. He thought he was on his way to purchase a used Toyota Matrix."By the way, if you want to k... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 14, 2007


Thursday Shout-Out: Mattress Police Supporters

It seems like everybody is celebrating a blogiversary these days. Suzy is celebrating her first, and Crummy Church Signs just celebrated its third. Well, I guess that's only two. Not really a trend, is it?Anyway, my own blog is now roughly a year ... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Thursday, September 13, 2007


Sock Drawer: Picture Edition!

Once in a while I do what I call a "sock drawer" post, where I post a bunch of random jokes and musings that I haven't figured out how to stretch into a full post. Lately I haven't had a lot of time to write blog posts, as I've been working on my pl... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Wednesday, September 12, 2007


Vote!

Yes, it's that time again. Vote for your favorite caption below. I'll post the winners on Friday. Choose wisely.The Contenders:Diesel: Where are those damn Adjutant Inspectors when you need them?- TheresaDiesel had misread the classified ad. He th... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Tuesday, September 11, 2007


The Mattress Police Quiz

A friend recently told me about a book that he read which reassessed some of the teachings of the Bible, such as Jesus' admonition to "turn the other cheek." Today this saying is often interpreted to mean that when attacked, one should simply "bend ... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Monday, September 10, 2007


Caption Contest: The Matrix

I'm not finding much inspiration in the current crop of movies or TV shows, so I'm going back to an old favorite again.You know the rules: submit your caption in the comments. Mrs. Diesel will pick her favorites and I'll post a poll on Tuesday. Ha... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Friday, September 07, 2007


Thursday Shout-Out: Karen from A Strange Life

Normally on Thursdays I do a post linking to some of my favorite blogs or blog posts. I was thinking of doing a post thanking those of you who signed up for the Humor-Blogs Revenue Referral Program, but I think I've done enough self-promotion for a ... [Read the full post]
Posted by Diesel on Thursday, September 06, 2007


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