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Hi. My name is Rob Kroese, AKA "Diesel." This is my blog. It has many words in it,
which are arranged in an intentionally amusing manner. I don't update it much any
more on account of IT WAS TAKING OVER MY LIFE. But hey, there's plenty of good
stuff in the archives. If you're new here, start with some of my Most Popular
Posts. And if you like that stuff, feel free to buy my novel. All proceeds go
toward proving to my junior high school teachers that I'm not a huge failure.
And if you're still not convinced, read a sample chapter here.
It's awesome.
Posts matching 'about'
I have to admit that I walked into the theater with pretty low expectations for the new end-of-the-world flick 2012. Roland Emmerich, the instigator of such dreck as 10,000 BC and The Day After Tomorrow, has not proven to my satisfaction that he’s ca... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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As the MF'ing Blog Tour nears its end, I decided to do something a bit different today. What follows is a conversation I recently had with the author of the new novel Marvellous Hairy, Mark Rayner. As Mercury Falls and Marvellous Hairy are both ... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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I'm over at Avitable's place today. Caution: The tagline of Avitable's blog is "tact is for pussies," which may give you an idea of the sort of content you'll find over there.Meet me back here tomorrow for the first part of a conversation with Mark R... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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When I heard that ABC was remaking the classic 80s alien invasion miniseries V, I have to admit I got a little tingly. Having seen what the SciFi (now SyFy) Channel did with an interstellar cheese-fest like Battlestar Galactica, I couldn't help but e... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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OLYMPUS 10/25 – Domestic Disturbance: Police were summoned to the residence of Zeus and his wife Metis when neighbors complained of “a sound like somebody being eaten.” Officers found Zeus in his front yard, naked and apparently intoxicated. When ... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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To the boys of my fifth grade class who were in attendance at Jeff Cornell’s 11th birthday party:
Hey fellas!
Wow, it’s been a while, hasn’t it? Let me get right to the point. I suppose you all remember Jeff Cornell’s 11th birthday party, whe... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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If you're like me, you're sick to death of these posts about my novel, Mercury Falls, so I'll keep this short. Mercury Falls is now available through Amazon.com. Just click here to order it.There has been a slight delay with the Kindle version; ... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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That's kind of a cruel post title, isn't it? Okay, so let's get this out of the way: no, I'm still not giving up on Mattress Police. Ideas for stupid little essays keep popping into my head, and as long as that keeps happening, this blog will keep go... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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In a world not too different from our own, there is a man whose plumbing expertise is so impressive that his customers and co-workers have no choice but to put up with his unparalleled arrogance and eccentricity. That man is Gregory House, plumber. (... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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I’m back. I still can’t tell you why I stopped blogging exactly, but I can tell you why I started up again. The urge to blog hit me on the way in to work a few days ago, when I saw a bumper sticker that read:
I would rather be quilting in a be... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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But wait, this is good. I've finally come up with some details about how you can win a copy.
Here's how it will work: From now until August 31, I will give away one copy for every five new fans of MERCURY FALLS. For example, right now there are 27... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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Over the past several months, I've been working on finding a publisher for my novel, Mercury Falls. Although the reception from agents has been positive, this is a particularly bad time for a new author to be trying to get published. The always-risk-... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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Over 500 people have signed up for the Mercury Falls interest list! Many thanks to everyone who blogged, emailed, tweeted, facebook and arm-twisted to get people to sign up.As promised, I'm beginning the process of self-publishing the book. I'm doing... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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The good news is that I'm healthy. The bad news, from your perspective, is that I seem to have stopped blogging. I'm not sure why. Part of it is that I've been focusing on revising the beginning of my novel, Mercury Falls. Tru... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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My gopher post got quite a reaction. Scott Oglesby commented on my observation that establishing a perimiter never seems to do any good on '24':You bring up an interesting point; I don’t think that I’ve ever seen a perimeter work in televi... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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Bar-Ob promises "swift closure" of extradimensional prison.KRYPTONOPOLIS - Ratcheting up the rhetoric in the race for Supreme Leader of Krypton, Demokryptic candidate Bar-Ob has promised to "close once and for all" the controversial extradimensional ... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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About six years ago, my wife and I purchased ten acres of farmland just outside of Ripon, California. Eight acres of the property are still orchard, while the front two acres serve as home to my wife and me, our two children, my father-in-law, and a... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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CrummyJoel said..."I WANT THE NAMES OF EVERY F*CKING LITERARY AGENT YOU KNOW!!!"SushiBoy said...Diesel rants, "That's the last time you'll ever get in the way of my eff'ing shot, stupid robot of a lighting technician."Shelley said..."Now get up ... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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It must be about time for a post that doesn't require much effort on my part. That's right, it's time for a Google Analytics search term post!Here are some of the phrases that people have used to get to this site overthe past month:funny monkey video... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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Things have been so insane at work that I haven't done one of these for a while. Sorry.First, you guys remember Doug from Taunt Vortex, previously one of the highest-ranking blogs on Humor-Blogs.com? Well, he's put blogging on hiatus, but he has star... [Read the full post]
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Do you find yourself thinking, "Sure, that was a pretty good post, but it's too bad
it's not 300 pages long"? Then you should totally buy my novel, Mercury Falls!
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