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Posts matching 'default'

Write the Novel You Want to Read, Part 2

In Part One of this series, I argued that the one indispensable ingredient to the success of a novel is enthusiasm. Before you can expect people to buy your book, they have to be excited about it, and to get them excited about it, you have to be exci... [Read the full post]


MP Mailbag

My gopher post got quite a reaction.  Scott Oglesby commented on my observation that establishing a perimiter never seems to do any good on '24':You bring up an interesting point; I don’t think that I’ve ever seen a perimeter work in televi... [Read the full post]


I'm up at the Book Roast blog today!

Mercury Falls is being featured over at the Book Roast blog today! Read an excerpt and leave a comment for a chance to win a $15 Amazon gift certificate. And make sure to sign up for the Mercury Falls interest list when you're done.I inexplicably inj... [Read the full post]


Retarded Search Terms!

It must be about time for a post that doesn't require much effort on my part. That's right, it's time for a Google Analytics search term post!Here are some of the phrases that people have used to get to this site overthe past month:funny monkey video... [Read the full post]


Tuesday Shout-out

Things have been so insane at work that I haven't done one of these for a while. Sorry.First, you guys remember Doug from Taunt Vortex, previously one of the highest-ranking blogs on Humor-Blogs.com? Well, he's put blogging on hiatus, but he has star... [Read the full post]


Dammit, Brad. I said NO SMILING. Now we have to take the picture again.

Hey Brad, I had a killer idea this weekend. Is this that thing about the sitcom based on the Elian Gonzalez story? Because dude, that was retarded. No, man, we're going to start a band! What kind of band? Sort of a soulful post-grunge-alter... [Read the full post]


Sock Drawer #18

Some of these will seem familiar to those of you following me on Twitter. That's because Twitter is actually a PORTAL TO THE FUTURE.I was recently presented with evidence that 15 years of being married to me is affecting Mrs. Diesel's brain. I found ... [Read the full post]


The Retarded Meme!

Since my retarded post, I've noticed that several bloggers have begun linking to me whenever they use the word "retarded."  It's like I'm becoming the official Internet authority on retardedness.  Which is, of course, awesome.I used to be the number ... [Read the full post]


Caption Contest: Angels and Demons

I know, it seems like I should be doing Wolverine, but I already did that one. So here's me in the sequel to the craptastic movie they made out of that craptastic book with Tom Hanks' craptastic hair.You know the rules: submit your captions in the co... [Read the full post]


MP Mailbag

During my hiatus, Kit Walker said:Pardon me, I know you're great and all, but how the heck did you get to #1 when you're not even posting? Are you cheating, or is it really truly true that absence makes the heart grow fonder? Well, Kit, it's like th... [Read the full post]


"Follow Your Dreams" and Other Terrible Advice

What the hell, people?I leave for two weeks and everything goes to crap.  First of all, I'm now number one on Humor-Blogs.com.  I told you to not let me "fall too far down in the rankings" while I was gone, not to vote me into first place.  How do yo... [Read the full post]


Taking a Breather

I've decided to take a little time off from blogging so I can finish toning down the awesomeness of Mercury Falls and catch up on some other things.  Don't worry; it will probably be just a week or two.   While you're waiting for me to come ba... [Read the full post]


MP Mailbag

First, thanks to Scott A and Katherine for alerting me that this site was generating a malware warning in Chrome.  On top of all the other problems I've been having with my sites, somehow some malicious script got inserted into my site.  No... [Read the full post]


Guest Post in which Johnny Truant Does Not Deny Being a Goat Molester

First, let me apologize for all the frequent outages and other weirdness lately on this site and Humor-Blogs.com/Blog-Storm.com.  Turns out my server didn't have enough memory to, um, remember that my websites are supposed to stay up for several... [Read the full post]


Yahoo! CEO adopts Chinese baby, puts plans to acquire Blog-Storm 'on hold indefinitely'

Yes, my previous post was a joke.  Even Yahoo! has better things to do than buy Blog-Storm and Humor-Blogs.com.If it makes you feel better, I felt REALLY BAD ALL DAY about fooling you.  I'm the kind of person who can't watch those hidden ca... [Read the full post]


Hey, can I borrow $700 billion to reassure you that my finances are sound?

Welcome to this special edition of Mattress Police - Antisocial Commentary. Recently we have seen the dollar gaining on foreign currencies and gas prices falling sharply, while the economy grows at a rate of 3.9% and interest rates remain historical... [Read the full post]


Sock Drawer

First, I'd like to thank those of you who, according to Technorati, have been linking to me since December 31, 1969. It takes a lot of faith to link to a blog that doesn't yet exist, written by someone who hasn't yet been born, using technology that... [Read the full post]


No (Pointing Out) Fat Chicks

My six year old daughter once said of one of the teachers at her school, "Mrs. _____ is really strong." She added, by way of clarification, "Because we can't say fat."I'm not sure where my daughter got the idea that strong is an appropriate euphemis... [Read the full post]


Just Give Me a Nice Big Knob and I'll Be Happy

One of the inevitable side effects of technology is that people try to improve things that are already working perfectly well.A prime example is the ventilation controls in automobiles. Remember when your car had one big lever for hot and cold and a... [Read the full post]


Thursday Shout-Out: Humor-Blogs.com

Hey, can he do that? Give a shout-out to his own site? This is like that time he made himself the featured blogger on humor-blogs.com. Man, this guy has a big head. What? Oh, why didn't you say so? I didn't realize this is what they meant by "s... [Read the full post]


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